She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
