Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
i've created a new STD.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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