Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
