I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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