we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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