Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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