I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I am naked and annoyed.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
