chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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