Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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