she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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