So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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