try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
