I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
40s are totally the cure
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
