Don't you send me to vm
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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