I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize