Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
