hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
