As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize