I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
