I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
