When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
