I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
