weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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