That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
