love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize