she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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