Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize