He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize