Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
