You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
