If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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