I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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