somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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