were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
