i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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