Where did you get a picture of my penis
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Floor bacon is actually really good
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
