I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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