I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize