I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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