Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize