i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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