I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
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