Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
