They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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