If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize