Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
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