I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize