You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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