gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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