I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
